It’s amazing to me, to look back and see who has shaped and influenced my life.  We can all look back and see teachers and mentors and doctors who have all impacted our lives and made us better people.  We read about historical figures and look into the lives of world figures and local characters.  For me, I think the greatest influences in my life came from my family.  My parents, my siblings, my grandparents, my aunts, uncles, great aunts, great uncles and cousins.  No book out there could give me the life lessons I’ve learned from them and no teacher could pass on those worldly life experiences they gave to me.  I’m not a wealth of knowledge, but I’m a healthy, spirited mix of DNA fueled by sound rational colorful figures in my life.  Those who have passed on, still have a dynamic influence on my day to day life.  They are helping me fight the fight on a daily basis.

The lessons I have learned, have sustained me throughout this ordeal, have given me a good perspective on life, have made me a better partner, and have taken me to this very day.  I know this part of the story is ancient history for most of you, but every day for me is profound.  Today, May 8, 2008, marks 2 years, 6 months of living.  It was 2½ years ago this afternoon that I awoke in the hospital room knowing a crisis had occurred but not fully understanding or comprehending the battle that would follow.  Within a few days, I would learn that my best prognosis was anywhere between 3 and 6 months.  Well, today is sort of like a birthday for me.  Today is the 6 month mark, and the extra two years . . . well, just icing on the cake.  It has been two years of miraculous living.  Two years of being loved and comforted by Charlie (Bo), friends and family, two years of traveling, two years of reconnecting and bonding, of letting go and of strengthening ties.  It has been a extraordinary two years to say the least . . . on so many levels.

We have had our ups and downs, our bumps in the road, our lane changes, detours, road blocks and highway closures.  These last two weeks in some way have been the hardest, but we are pulling through and forging ahead.  We flew to Costa Rica which we thought would be a wonderful 10-day respite, but it was the beginning of a new fight, one which hit us below the belt, but one which we’ve been successfully dueling, and we will triumph.  New tumors in new places have popped up.  In addition to the chemo which I am doing almost weekly, we’ve added in a new regimen of radiation for my head.  I have a total of 15 sessions of radiation, and then we will revisit an MRI of the brain to be sure we have all of the lesions.  If any new ones appear, we can use a "spot" radiation procedure to "cut them out".  At any rate, these new lesions were in a strange way comforting to me, as they explained a lot of side-effects I was observing while in Costa Rica.  It explained some visual disturbances that were occurring as well as some loss of fine motor skills.  While they haven’t resolved 100%, they should very soon.

Today is a celebration of sorts, a milestone, a miracle.  No one could have predicted that 2½ years after the life we had known was shattered, I would still be here communicating with my family and friends, but I am, I will continue, and the fact of the matter is, that I have too many goals to achieve to allow any outside force to stop me.  Too many paintings to paint, too many friends and family members to celebrate each day with, too many places in the world yet to be seen or revisited.  My actual birthday is in August, and I will be 50.  It will be a welcome addition to my list of things to celebrate.

To those of you who are parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins and friends, please know the impact you alone have on one small child, and make everyday count.  Every giggle, smile, laugh, frown, story, lunch, and family gathering has an impact on that person and may be remembered years after you are gone.  Make each moment count.

With much love,

Randy