Well,

Round three is over and finished.   Although it was suppose to be my most difficult chemo to date, I actually came through it better that the first two rounds.   The chemo is very tough.   While I was still in the hospital completing my second round of chemo, I told Charlie in a weak moment that I didn't think I could do it again.   I was so weak and very toxic.   I was bloated with chemicals and all I could smell and taste were chemicals.   I felt like a toxic waste dump.   Well, once I started recovering from the chemo, I was determined to get myself in even better shape to face round three.   I worked out at the gym daily and also walked the treadmill.   I came through this last round of chemo even better than the first two.   My doctor was extremely surprised.   This is a very aggressive chemo, and it should have made me feel even worse that the first two.   I am determined not to feel that bad again if I have it in my power to prevent it.

I really appreciate your notes and cards.   It's been a very tough journey.   I just know that I WILL get through this.   I've always appreciated life to the fullest . . . large and small . . .   so I'm not exactly sure what lessons I am to learn here.   The journey has given me the opportunity to stop seeing patients and focus more on me, but I'm only 47 and was absolutely sure that my life would last to somewhere between 88 and 96 y/o.   Of course back in November, doctors were sure I would not see 48 y/o.   WRONG!   I'll be 48 in one month, and I have no intentions of going anywhere . . .  except a quick painting workshop weekend trip to Boston.

I have accepted that fact that Charlie and I can only make the best decisions possible and then the rest is out of our hands.   I feel we have done that.   I believe this disease will disappear from my body as mysteriously as it appeared.   My mind and body are not willing to accept it growing within me.   I truly believe that the last 30 years of working out was to get my body and mind strong enough to fight this disease.  My body did not fail me that night in November when I needed it to help me survive.   So far, I am winning the battle on all accounts!   The final results of the MRI came in.   It has shown that the lesion in the liver has decreased in size by 2 cm. just less than 1 ", after just 2 treatments.   We will have another MRI done after the 4th treatment.   One more week and I return to the hospital for my fourth round of chemo.   Please know that I am very grateful for no visitors and no phone calls during my hospitalization.   I get no sleep in the hospital and so I’m pretty lousy company anyhow.   I spend my day napping and painting.  Below is what I started in the hospital this visit.   Work in progress!   I am always happy to see Charlie enter my room with a handful of e-mails.   My best naps are when we are together.

Best wishes to all.

! Disfrute !

Randy